Rants, raves, trees and stars

Winter's here and surf's up!

Just like Wing Chun, I had a silent shouty moment in the gym last week. Waiting for my Pilates class to start, i noticed a 'dude' and just wanted to shriek at the top of my lungs 'what the f**k, you f**king loser, who the f**k wears a TRUCKER HAT in the gym!!!!' and then wanted to yank it off his head, stamp up and down on it a bit and point the guy's bald spot out to everyone around him - and who says gyms destress you!

Managed to get out of the house at about 11 today. Having had a duvet saturday, I realised that i needed to breathe some fresh air! Actually remembering to take my camera along, here are a few pics of my travels on a sunny sunday.

Who says we don't work hard in I.T.? A dramatic recreation of Charlie in last night's Lost created by the artistic team de jour of Greg, Graeme and Suse!

It's truly appalling that i haven't updated in so long - it's been a very long stressy summer and it's nice to get back into the colder weather where i feel more comfortable.

i've been told i must have the opposite of SAD as i'm not so great with the hot weather of the summer months and get happy as soon as September hits and you start feeling that crisp cold feeling in the mornings. It's the memory time of the year when a walk down the street feels like a new school year starting and buying a new pencil case and new pens, bonfires wafting across the breeze, those damned craneflies that fly straight at you, orange fuzzy caterpillars on the ground that you step round to avoid and just achingly beautiful sweeping hazy sunsets over the shoreline. But i do seem to be one of the few people that enjoys colder weather - it's the eastern european in me i guess!

Mood: tired, oh so tired
Listening to: Jeff Buckley's helping me ease into the day

Went to a friend's yesterday afternoon on the pretence of watching the FA Cup Final but really all just got together for a good natter. Now, you know you live in the gay capital of the UK when snippets of the conversation during the football include:
"so, which colour are which then?"
"that black looks dreadful, too funereal"
"rugby boys just look better somehow, much more rugged and up for it looking",
"but yeh, the best ones aren't classically good looking, they've just got that air about them"
"Lampaugh"
"ooh, Dennis Wise, he's so cute and cheeky"
"oh, that one there, though he does look like he's veering a bit too much on the side of 'i'd beat your grandmother up if you paid me enough' look"

But also the baby capital of the south east with
"ooh, almost a goal, STOP THAT RIGHT NOW, LEAVE HER ALONE!!"
"the wheels on the bus go round and round"
"are babies allowed to bitchslap each other at that age?"

So, fun was had by all but i cried off before Eurovision as there was increasing talk of baby baths and i could feel a headache coming on.

Tried my very best to watch Eurovision - terry wogan truly is a genius, but sleep took over just as Javenia, jamelia, whatever her name is had finished (and she was only the second one on, what a saturday nite party animal i am!). Woke up this morning to the news that she'd come 3rd to the bottom out of 18, nil point indeed!

My mate Kit Hui has got her short film, Missing, into the Short Film Competition at Cannes, out of a massive 3,000 entries! Not sure where my free ticket to the south of france is but...regardless, here's her website, so check it out!

http://www.factory630.com/

Mood:still cold - is it spring yet? jeez!
Listening to: Digital Ashes for a Digital Urn - Bright Eyes

So, could i really be bothered to reach over to my bookshelf and pull out my well thumbed html book to look at how to get my links back into my blog or could i procrastinate for weeks over it and then just decide on a new template instead cos it included all the html happiness i'd need - yep, the latter. But hey, procrastination is good for the soul!

The Empire Film Awards 2005 - tv coverage

This is not the most perfect review in the world. It’s pretty Josh-centric with a few added ‘squees’ to my fave films and directors. You’ve been warned.

In fact, I’ve already committed a reviewing cardinal sin by missing the first few minutes of the programme but never mind. According to the Empire website http://www.empireonline.co.uk/awards2005/gallery/ , I only missed introductions from Empire and the presenter for the evening, Johnnie Vaughan. Soooo, turning over after watching a hilarious last few minutes of No Angels on Channel 4, I tuned in just in time to see the clips for Best Newcomer and Sienna trying her best to act her way out of that paper bag in Alfie and really failing miserably. Can someone please tell me what she’s got going for her aside from tassled skirts?

First up to present is the wonderful, the delightful…(drum roll in my head), Mr Joshua Jackson. Johnnie Vaughan introduces our man with quite a long speech on ‘a man whose gone from teen heartthrob to proving his acting chops on stage etc. etc.’ and here the delectable guy comes, doing the long walk of shame up from his table at the gorgeously dressed Guildhall in London, looking, quite simply, stunning – Josh, not the venue. Much jumping up and down on the bed ensues and, as soon as JJ opens his mouth, I completely zone out. Have no idea if he said ‘thanks for having me here’ or ‘it’s a delight to be here’, no clue, just focusing on that bod, those eyes and the deep, deep timbre of that voice. Hell, he could be reading out a list of prime numbers and millions of us’d be happy! The winner for Best Newcomer is the little kid from Finding Neverland (a film that, despite myself, I did enjoy, cried buckets at the end and – there’s definitely an aural thing going on here – spent most of listening to Johnny Depp’s gorgeous Scottish accent). Josh does a little knee bend to give the kid his award and my mind starts going off into dreams of just what this man would look like with kids.

What Josh is wearing – let’s discuss. You can go to Mandy’s fabulous website http://www.josh-jackson.net to see all the photos. Thank you Mandy for feeding our addiction! But, my prime concern is ‘too casual?’ Sorry to say this, m’boy, but yes, definitely. Surely his hair can’t be looking that bad that the hat had to stay on indoors (strike one for him on my husband #3 list (John Cusack will always be #2 and Mr Babes is course numero uno) as I still think it’s really impolite for men to wear hats indoors, it just really erks me). The only other male guest not in some kind of suit is Kevin Smith and, hell, he’s so cool he gets away with wearing worn out skater shorts under a suspiciously dirty mac! But Josh, come on, scruffy black jeans and THAT BELT AGAIN: http://www.josh-jackson.net/Appearances/05empirefilm/04.jpg, do not a film legend make. In fact, every man there is in a suit, even the toilet cleaners and the guy handing out the bread rolls. I am screaming at the tv – ‘Matthew Williamson, Paul Smith! Josh! They’re all in the Yellow Pages and just ten minutes stroll from your theatre – get yourself down there and get some decent clothes!! Now!!!’ Sheesh.

Once I calmed down a bit..actually I ranted and raved at the tv for the next fifty minutes on various subjects – mostly to myself after much eye-rolling from Mr Babes, my heart was gladdened by the growing realisation that some tv editor somewhere in charge of this programme is a Josh fan as the only guest to get more than one ‘close up at table shot’ was the man himself – at least three close-ups, scattered evenly throughout the programme..sigh, dereamee.

Okay, so the rest of the ceremony was pretty good too. The great thing about these awards is that all of them are voted for by Empire Film readers and the magazine itself can be a film geek’s dream (though I had gone off it in recent years when it started to show a few too many buxom lasses on its front covers and got displayed next to all the ‘Lad’s mags’ – Loaded, Maxim etc., ugh) but you still get most of the higher echelons of film cool attending the ceremony as it’s a guaranteed piss up every year. And it’s so nice to see film stars looking like they are genuinely having a good time and not being ferried from pillar to post by the Oscar Police. To name a few of the stars attending: Quentin Tarantino, Kevin Smith and Jason Meers, Helen Mirren, Matt Damon, Simon Pegg, Jenny Agutter (Mr Babes swooned at her presence!), Sophie Okenodo, Daniel Craig, Michael Madsen, that gorgeous chap from Green Wing… Johnnie Vaughan did a stellar turn as presenter and some of his quips were spot on – especially his thanking the many, many hangers on (!) – which takes me nicely to my next point.

Bird on the arm of Josh – let’s discuss. As far as I know and have seen, she’s a kind of Daytime TV stylist – one of a number of c-list designers that appear on daytime talk shows overemphasising just how important taupe is this season. She’s certainly no Stella McCartney. However, from the tv spots I’ve seen her in, her outfit on the night is pretty much her standard. I won’t use the word skank as my fellow TWOPers have gone into great depths on that one already, I’ll just say that the one close up of her at the table caused me to leap back in my seat, aghast at the horror I was witnessing in close up form. The word ‘Socialite’, mentioned in several pieces about her, also fill me with dread. Maybe she's a nice person, who knows?

Onto the other awards – well, the ones I’m interested in anyway:
A huge cheer from me as Kevin Smith gets the Independent Spirit Award – he trudges up to the stage in the aforementioned dirty mac outfit (he’s so troll-like yet so gifted) and makes a superb speech whereby he declares he would like to do what a previous Golden Globe winner did and pass his Award onto someone that he feels is more worthy. When he says Quentin Tarantino, we cut to said auteur who shouts out ‘Fuck you man, keep your award!’ and laughs maniacally. You certainly wouldn’t hear that level of swearing at the Oscars, yay for Empire! Kevin continues by saying that he ‘would like to’ pass the award onto Quentin, but he’s not going to, so ner. As Kevin then quite rightly points out, Quentin’s a genius and Kevin’s just about made Gigli 2 so this award ain’t going anywhere! Hurrah!

Best British Film – the one that geeks like me are keeping our fingers crossed for all over the country. And the winner is… Shaun of the Dead! I would like to say that I cheer and clap politely at this point, but my Essex heritage decides to pop out at this point with a huge ‘Go On My Son!!!’, like it’s some winning goal, and jumping three feet off my bed!!! I am ecstatic as are Simon Pegg, the cast and Simon’s co-writer/director in the film who has a very peculiar squeaky voice. They all trundle up to the stage and beam at each other and quite rightly too – never has such a good film been passed over for so many awards - they've finally got what they deserve. Rent it now, it’s got blood on it.

Best Actress (International) – the gorgeous Julie Delpy for Before Sunset (another superb film), who happens to be sitting at Josh’s table – one can only hope this hugely intelligent woman will collect her award (making a great speech in which she completely forgets what she was going to say and collapses into laughter with many a swear word, but with a French accent, so it’s tres cute), go back to her seat, get That Bird in a headlock, march her off the premises and get Josh to realise the error of his ways and go home with her (and visit a suit shop or two on the way) (or is Julie Delpy married? No idea - she is the kind of gal i'd like to get drunk on margheritas and go dancing with though).

Best Actor (International) – Matt Damon – why? No, really, what’s the punchline? I don’t get it. At all. Too potato-face for me. Good speech though where he admits that this is the only award he’s ever won and that the movie pretty much sucked.

Best Film (International) – the Bourne Supremacy; see above for aghast astonishment take two.
As it’s Empire’s 10th Anniversary this year, they’ve got a special award of Icon of the Decade. Michael Madsen shimmies onto stage (and boy, can that man shimmy!) so there’s no guesses as to who’s this decade’s icon. Hot damn, Michael looks sooo good – again, it’s the gravelly voice that does it, yum! Michael introduces Quentin and a long tracking shot follows the great one from his table to the stage, with all the audience standing and with, omigod, a side step to Josh and a chummy slap to Josh’s chest, agh!!! Please, please, please, please, a thousand times please, let this indicate a fondness for Josh and a desire to have him cast in his next film, PLEASE!!! Josh is the only guy he gladhands (well, gladchests, sigh) on his way to the stage, maybe The Hat is getting him noticed after all. This rumour developing in my tiny brain is further enhanced by ANOTHER close up of Josh during Quentin’s speech, HoYay-like in timing. Quentin does his usual enthusiastic rambling (see, I do that kind of rambling too, where are my millions? Harumph.) about how UK filmgoers have always embraced and nurtured him and how he loves us all.

And with that, it’s all over. It’s definitely at times like these when I miss not being in ‘the biz’ anymore and being able to fenangle my way into these kind of events – I would gladly be called a hanger-on if I was in that audience. Aside from assisting young Ms Delpy in her removal of That Bird of course.

Now, I’m just awaiting the latest edition of Empire – which will be duly scanned and sent to Mandy as soon as it hits the shops - and a photo or two might get folded up and put under my pillow, Michael and Josh, sigh…